Horoscopes: mercury signs and the group chat

ARIES

Blows up the group chat by starting every story with "okay you're NOT going to believe this..." and then telling the story in twelve increasingly longer messages.

TAURUS

Thinks the group chat is handy for finding people to get coffee or hang out, but that's about it.

GEMINI

Responds to everything someone says, no matter how short or how last minute. Uses the group chat like a personal blog.

CANCER

Mercury Cancers are notorious gossips and think that complaining is a way to bond with people. They're probably the ones who keep the group chat interesting. 

LEO

 Posts every time they get bored (which is often.) Uses the group chat for anything from asking what to get for dinner to posting existential queries at four AM. 

VIRGO

Never uses the group chat unless it's to ask people to form a study group.

LIBRA

Probably the person who made the group chat in the first place, because Mercury Libras know everybody and love nothing more than introducing people to each other.

SCORPIO

Doesn't post very often, but lurks constantly. Will only respond if someone uses the @ function/addresses them directly.

SAGITTARIUS

Offers advice regardless of who asked–usually no one.

CAPRICORN

If Mercury Capricorns want to talk to someone, they'll just send a text message. They never use the group chat unless out of necessity or because they want to clear their notifications.

AQUARIUS

Overuses emojis, especially the crying-laughing one (you know which one). Prone to typing "wow lol" or "omg" or "that's cool" absentmindedly while doing three other things at once. 

PISCES

Blows up the group chat with memes.